I have found, over the past several years, that patients (in general) don’t know how to say “aaaah” during the ENT exam.

It goes like this:

me: Open your mouth widely and say ‘aahhhhh’
pt: opens mouth widely, makes no noise whatever
me: say ‘aahhhh’
pt: nothing
me: (bumping stretcher) say ‘aahhhhh’
pt: ‘aahhhh’

I don’t know when we stopped teaching how to say aahh. I learned in the doctors’ office from about 2jillion cases of tonsillitis, but I have an idea who’s to blame: TV.

Old doctor show: Marcus Welby, MD; you got a friendly exam by a nice grey-haired doc, and at some point ‘aaah’ came in.

Today’s doctor show: Intubation, central lines, chest tubes, cracked chests or crack babies. No aaah.

OK, that’s a little simplistic, but I’m a simplistic guy.