March 19, 2024

A reader wrote to offer a picture taken in his ED, and it’s not just an excellent photo, it begs for a caption contest!

 

His introduction to the photo: “Just walked in to start my shift at 6:30am and this was sitting on the counter…”

 

Joel Goldberg, MD Grand Rapids, MI

Photo courtesy Joel Goldberg, MD Grand Rapids, MI

 

As usual, the rules for a caption contest here: Put you submission in the comments, I decide the winner, and the prize is the pride you get from lording your superior captioning skills over the losers other submissions.  Polls close in a week, or when there’s a clear winner.

49 thoughts on “Guest Photo, and a Caption Contest

  1. Doc, I had to smoke 400 packs in order to get enough points for my Winston Med Case… man, but was it worth it?!

  2. drugs a la carton; pharmaceutical cornucopia; the photo is the response in the history where the patient says, “I take the white one”

  3. “My chest pain started about an hour ago. I went outside and had a few smokes to see if it would get better. It didn’t, so I came here.”
    (Note – this may be cheating for the contest – a VA patient really told me that once).

  4. Had to have something to carry around my Wellbutrin, Chantix, Nicorette, Nicotrol, Nicoderm, and Commit lozenges…

  5. “Yeah, I got this’n from Dr. Gurley and this’n from Dr. Bates. That thar come from Dr. Rob. And them big ‘uns from Dr. Chen. Wait…wait…lemme see ’em. Nah, they come from Dr. Val. Ah git them purty docs mixed up. The box? Oh, just roun’ the house. I can quit anytime ya know…anytime.”

  6. “Ok, let’s see if they’re all here — Theophylline, Mucinex, Spiriva, Tussionex, Claritin D, Levaquin, Xanax….did I forget my nicotine patches again??”

  7. No, Doc, I don’t think I want the patch, Don’t ya think I take enough meds? Look at all them in thar! Besides, I couldn’t afford the copay!

  8. Look, I am not addicted to cigarettes. I use to smoke those Marlboro’s, but since R.J.Reynolds came out with these healthy “additive free” smokes, I thought you would be happy I now only smoke ones that are good for me.”

  9. Can you get my dad into see a psychiatrist? He keeps lighting his pill bottles on fire and sucking on them and then he swallows a half dozen cigarettes every day with a glass of water.

  10. No, I don’t smoke. This is the original container the pharmacy gave me when I went to get my refills. They’re trying to stay away from plastic bags. The environment, you know…

  11. “I had to buy my cigs at Costco to get a box big enough to hold my oxygen tank!”

  12. “Nurse, you’re gonna have to tell that Doc. that I already pay over 200.00 a month for cigarettes. I can’t be payin another two hundred dollars just for some oxygen. Can he atleast write the prescription for generic? It does come in generic, right?”

  13. “This is MOST of my medication…but if ya want…someone else could bring the rest to ya. Ummm… do I know the names? Uhhh… not really… but I know the doc gets upset when I don’t take one of them. Nope…not sure why I take it but its a little brown pill. No…no list either. I figured you guys would know. :)”

  14. Out of concern for my health and the environment, I brought my expired meds so you can dispose of them for me. All those toxins are so unhealthy.

  15. Naw Doc, these are just the ones I take after my morning smoke. You should see the ones before bed but your security wouldn’t let me in with the Milwaukie’s Best box!

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